THE AMBER DEA LUX JOURNAL

There comes a point in life when you realize something: You haven't exactly lost yourself. But you may have gotten very, very good at putting yourself last. You work. You take care of people. You pay the bills. You make the appointments. You remember birthdays. You answer the texts. You keep everybody's world moving. And somewhere in the middle of all that living... you can quietly stop participating in your own life. That's what I want to change. And it's the reason behind s

There are days when I genuinely think my brain deserves its own television show. Not a drama. Not a documentary. A sitcom. Picture it. Everything is going well. I've had a productive day. I've crossed things off my list. Someone says something kind. I feel motivated. I'm actually enjoying life. Cue the upbeat sitcom music. Then someone sends a text that sounds a little short. Or doesn't text back. Or makes an offhand comment. Or looks distracted during a conversation. The mus

Every year it starts the same way. "This is the year." The year I lose the weight. The year I get toned. The year I fit into the clothes hanging in the back of my closet. The year I finally feel comfortable in a bathing suit. The year I become the version of myself I've been promising for years. Then life happens. Work gets busy. Stress shows up. Someone gets sick. Money gets tight. Motivation disappears. Menopause decides to choose violence. The months pass. And suddenly it'

The ideas we carry about sex, desire, intimacy, and our bodies didn't appear out of nowhere. Maybe it's time to decide which ones still belong to us. Have you ever stopped and wondered where your beliefs about sex actually came from? Not what you believe today. Go further back. Before the relationships. Before the marriage. Before the heartbreaks, experiences, confidence, insecurities and years of figuring yourself out. Where did you first learn what sex was supposed to be? B